Admission of Guilt

I am the most hippy dippy, crunchy granola, loving & compassionate chick who rescues spiders, lives green, recycles everything, believes in karma, actually practices random acts of kindness, laughs all the way to the bank on purpose, is open hearted, always searching to do the greatest good, and seriously wouldn't hurt a fly.

But I admit it. Each day as I walk to my car, I deliberately step on the snails on the sidewalk, hearing the crunch of the shell under my foot, grinding all my hatred into that one slimy little body as I mutter under my breath, "Shiva, May you be reborn in your highest form and may you have been a lawyer in your past life." I tell ya, lawyers & snails keep me from reaching enlightenment this time around.

Got any good lawyer jokes for me?

Light as a Feather

Ma'at was the Egyptian Goddess of Truth, Justice and Order. Her headdress ostrich feather served as the ultimate arbiter of the goodness of a man's life, and was balanced against a newly deceased person's heart on the scales of justice as a precondition of being permitted to pass into the Afterlife. Those whose hearts were heavy with wicked deeds had their souls devoured immediately by the demigod Ammin. Only those whose were lighter than Ma'at's feather were permitted to pass through into immortality with the Gods.

Is your heart light as a feather, or ready to be devoured by a demigod?

Bag Lady

Here I am
With all my baggage
Here I am
Take me as I am

Here I am
With all my emotional baggage
Here I am
With all of my burdens

Here I am
Complete with all my luggage
Packed with the past
Bursting with stories

Take me as I am
This is how I come, complete
With all my crap, all my stuff
This is what I come with

But I’ve got a grip
Yeah, I’ve got a handle on things
And anything I can’t carry
I just let go
I just let slip

Here I am, with all my baggage
To get me through my trips
Yeah, guilt trips power trips ego trips
I might have a lot of baggage
But at least I’ve got a grip

In my left hand is my heart
Full of sorrow from betrayal
In my right hand is my head
Full of doubts and regrets
And on my back is my burden
Weighing me down with my fears
And in my arms is my child
And a frying pan, and a pen
And in my head is the world
And war and global warming
And in my mind
Is everything I’ve ever done wrong
And in my soul
I struggle to find my song...

But deep down in my front pocket
I’ve got this little zipped up purse
Full of change...

Change of mind
Change of heart
Change of attitude
Change of underwear
Change is my friend, yeah

And it might seem to you
That I have a lot of baggage
But I’ve got a handle on it
Yeah, I’ve got a grip
And anything I can’t hold on to
I just let go,
I just let slip

And now I don't expect you
To take on my baggage
No, I just want you
To pick up your own
Get a handle on it, get a grip

While we walk on this road
While we travel together
Or else we let go
We just let slip

Take me as I am
Even with all my baggage
Take me as I am
Because I’m a package deal...

Sustainable Energy

I was cold
Someone handed me a sparkler
I was bedazzled
Until it fizzled
I long for
your hearth.

Illuminate my Darkest Cave

Uzume is the goddess of dawn and revelry in the Shinto religion of Japan. She famously relates to the tale of the missing sun deity, Amaterasu, goddess of beauty.

Amaterasu's brother, the storm god Susano'o, had vandalised her sacred buildings and killed one of her maidens because she refused to trust him. In turn, the goddess became terrified of his wrath and retreated into a cave. The world, without the illumination of the sun, became dark and the gods could not lure Amaterasu out of her hiding place.

The clever Uzume overturned a tub near the cave entrance and began a sexy & bawdy dance on it, exposing her breasts and genitals in front of the other deities. They considered this so comical that they laughed heartily at the sight.

Amaterasu heard them, and peered out to see what all the fuss was about. When she opened the cave, she saw her glorious reflection in a mirror Uzume had placed on a tree, and slowly emerged from her hiding spot.

(I don't know about you, but I'm ready for a sexy & bawdy dance to bring me out of my cave...)

What's Your REAL age?

Check out this site, www.poodwaddle.com - it has age clocks - you plop in your biological age, answer a bunch of questions & it spits out your "real age" and life expectancy.

My bio age is 41. My "real age" is 22. I can expect to live to be 95. How about you? What's your REAL age?

3 Changes

Three changes I have made which have improved my life tremendously:

No TV
When I was married, TV guide ran our life. I disconnected cable when we divorced, eleven years ago. I enjoy movies & dvds, love tv at a friends house, but the gift of time and being on my own schedule is immeasurable. I read, do art, play games, garden, run my business, and of course, blog instead.

No alarm clock
Once I stopped going to bed according to the TV schedule, I started going to bed whenever I felt tired & naturally waking up at dawn. I sleep a lot - 9 or 10 hours a night. I also got rid of all the clocks in the house, besides for one in the kitchen & one upstairs, which, like my car, are all set 10 minutes fast. This little trick has worked for years to get me everywhere on time, and has led to me to theorize about "personal time zones".

No scale
I haven't owned a scale in almost twenty years, and weigh myself about 2-3 a year - at the doctor's office & at my parents house. No matter what the numbers, I trip myself out. Body image is not about actual size, but perceptions of self. Getting rid of that scale was getting rid of my daily judgment and has helped me love my body throughout all of it's fluctuations.

What three changes have most improved your life?