Sustainable Energy

I was cold
Someone handed me a sparkler
I was bedazzled
Until it fizzled
I long for
your hearth.

Illuminate my Darkest Cave

Uzume is the goddess of dawn and revelry in the Shinto religion of Japan. She famously relates to the tale of the missing sun deity, Amaterasu, goddess of beauty.

Amaterasu's brother, the storm god Susano'o, had vandalised her sacred buildings and killed one of her maidens because she refused to trust him. In turn, the goddess became terrified of his wrath and retreated into a cave. The world, without the illumination of the sun, became dark and the gods could not lure Amaterasu out of her hiding place.

The clever Uzume overturned a tub near the cave entrance and began a sexy & bawdy dance on it, exposing her breasts and genitals in front of the other deities. They considered this so comical that they laughed heartily at the sight.

Amaterasu heard them, and peered out to see what all the fuss was about. When she opened the cave, she saw her glorious reflection in a mirror Uzume had placed on a tree, and slowly emerged from her hiding spot.

(I don't know about you, but I'm ready for a sexy & bawdy dance to bring me out of my cave...)

What's Your REAL age?

Check out this site, www.poodwaddle.com - it has age clocks - you plop in your biological age, answer a bunch of questions & it spits out your "real age" and life expectancy.

My bio age is 41. My "real age" is 22. I can expect to live to be 95. How about you? What's your REAL age?

3 Changes

Three changes I have made which have improved my life tremendously:

No TV
When I was married, TV guide ran our life. I disconnected cable when we divorced, eleven years ago. I enjoy movies & dvds, love tv at a friends house, but the gift of time and being on my own schedule is immeasurable. I read, do art, play games, garden, run my business, and of course, blog instead.

No alarm clock
Once I stopped going to bed according to the TV schedule, I started going to bed whenever I felt tired & naturally waking up at dawn. I sleep a lot - 9 or 10 hours a night. I also got rid of all the clocks in the house, besides for one in the kitchen & one upstairs, which, like my car, are all set 10 minutes fast. This little trick has worked for years to get me everywhere on time, and has led to me to theorize about "personal time zones".

No scale
I haven't owned a scale in almost twenty years, and weigh myself about 2-3 a year - at the doctor's office & at my parents house. No matter what the numbers, I trip myself out. Body image is not about actual size, but perceptions of self. Getting rid of that scale was getting rid of my daily judgment and has helped me love my body throughout all of it's fluctuations.

What three changes have most improved your life?

I'm a Strong Woman, I'm Stronger Than You Think

I'm a strong woman, I'm stronger than you think
I'm a strong woman, I follow my instincts
I can drive across the country in my little car
I can drive a big ol' truck easily just as far

I'm a strong woman, I know my self worth
I'm a strong woman, I can love the earth
I can look the sun straight in the eye
But I'm not so stupid I'd actually try

I'm a strong woman, I can sing out of tune
I'm a strong woman, but still sleep till noon
I can walk 17 miles just like it was one
I can love my woman and make her come

I'm a strong woman, I can laugh at the sky
I'm a strong woman, I'm not ashamed to cry
I can hold my woman, I can hold my drink
Just remember, I'm a stronger than you think.

(written in 1990)

Tips for Transformation

Here's the list I give my clients. What with the stress of the holidays, it might be helpful.

• Drink water: no ice - you’ll drink more; same with using a straw. When you urinate, consciously let go of whatever has been pissing you off lately. Same when you defecate - say out loud, “I now release all this old crap.” Notice that as you release the accumulated emotional and physical toxins, the sense of well being and serenity that permeates your body.

• Breathe: take in what you need, and let go of what no longer serves you. Take deeper and deeper breaths until you feel the richness in your veins. Laughter is the best medicine - Breathe into your Buddha belly and feel a big belly laugh whenever you want to feel high.

• Purify: hot showers, hot baths, hot tubs saunas: release toxins naturally and effectively. Transmute old poisons, shed your skin, wash away the past to feel cleansed and renewed. Neti pots cleanse the sinuses & clear the head of congested thoughts.

• Cry: with a friend, a counselor, your favorite pet, a sappy movie, or yourself. Release grief, disappointment, guilt, heart break, frustration & the chemical compounds found only in emotional tears.

• Combine modalities: Chiropractic, acupuncture, traditional therapy, Reiki, nutrition and massage support the mind-body connection made during hypnosis. Ask for personal recommendations.

• Meditate: Start your day by simply stating your intentions, take a minute to visualize them as if they have already occurred, feel that in your body, and breathe it into every cell of your being. To further amplify this frequency, write in your journal, speak your truth, or better yet, sing your truth. Attract what you need in order to grow.

• Love your body: Feed yourself good, yummy foods that you truly enjoy to nourish your whole being; play with your body, dance, do yoga, go roller skating, get an exercise ball, stretch. Get rid of your scale - you’ll be surprised how much happier you’ll feel.

• Sleep: as much as you want to. Take naps. Remember your dreams. Your mind and body are doing the repair work. This is where deep healing occurs. Allow yourself to go to bed when you want to, and to wake up when you want to. Get rid of your alarm clock - you’ll be surprised how easily you wake up when you need to, feeling rejuvenated, relaxed and refreshed, ready for a new day.

Sex for Health!

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.

2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.

3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.

4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!

5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.

6.. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!

7 Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.

8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.

9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.

10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.

Bitter, me?

Bitter, me?
Oh yes, one of my five tastes
Sweet, savory, salty, pungent
and then there's bitter...

My bitterness is not
Organic, green, dandelion leaves or ginger
Hot, cold, Swedish or otherwise
A tonic

My bitterness is not
Organic, shade grown, black tea or coffee
Hot, cold, Italian or otherwise
An amphetamine

My bitterness is
Organic, intense, dark, the heart of the cocoa bean
Pure, chocolate, sweetened with cream and always
An aphrodisiac...

Bring Back my Smiley to Me

You might not be sure what I'm saying
You might not be sure what to think
Am I raising an eyebrow
Or trying to show you a wink?

Bring back, bring back
Bring back my Smiley to me, to me
Bring back, bring back
Bring back my Smiley to me

You might not see me blushing
Or even my face in a frown
Maybe I’m blowing kisses
Who knows, my menu is down

Bring back, bring back...

Last night as I lay on my pillow
Last night as I lay on my bed
Last night as I lay on my pillow
I dreamed that my Smiley was dead

Bring back, bring back...

I sent a message to tech support
I emailed them my plea
Help me with my emoticons
And bring back my Smiley to me

Bring back, bring back...

I miss rolling in laughter
Sticking my tongue out in glee
Winking right back at you
Please bring back my Smileys to me!

Bring back, bring back
Bring back my Smiley to me, to me
Bring back, bring back
Bring back my Smiley to me!

Received/Replied

Email received:

I am the swimmer who can't swim!!
I am the driver that can't find the road!!
I am the jumper who can't jump!!
I am the seer that can't see!!
I am the seeker who can't find!!
But worst of all!! I am the man with out you!!

My reply:

If you can't swim, walk.
If you can't find the road, follow the stars.
If you can't jump, hop.
If you can't see, listen.
If you can't find, know.
And best of all, if you are the man without me,
Then find the woman without you...
She's closer than you think....

Blessed be.

Muses on Runcible Spoons

Edward Lear's best-known poem, The Owl and the Pussycat, published in 1871, includes the passage

They dined on mince and slices of quince,
which they ate with a runcible spoon.

Another mention of this piece of cutlery appears in the alphabetical illustrations Twenty-Six Nonsense Rhymes and Pictures. Its entry for "D" reads

The Dolomphious Duck,
who caught Spotted Frogs for her dinner
with a Runcible Spoon

Lear does not appear to have had any firm idea of what the word "runcible" means. His whimsical nonsense verse celebrates words primarily for their sound, and a specific definition is not needed to appreciate his work. However, since the 1920s (several decades after Lear's death), modern dictionaries have generally defined a runcible spoon to be a fork with three prongs, such as a pickle fork, which is curved like a spoon, and also has a cutting edge. It should be noted that this definition is not consistent with Lear's drawing of a "runcible spoon", mentioned above, nor does it account for the other "runcible" objects in Lear's poems.

* Scroobious is an adjective which he applied to people in some of his verses, including the unfinished "Scroobious Pip." It seems to imply disapproval of their conduct, although the Pip is "the wisest" of whatever sort of beast he may be. It may be a pseudo-Latin derivative of screwball. The word has since been used by other people.

See also

* spork

Which is your favorite word: Runcible, Scroobius or Spork?

Bedside Reading

I don't feel happy unless i have a big stack of books by my bed. I tend to buy three at a time, and usually read one fiction and one nonfiction, plus a journal concurrently.

Right now there is:
Sex Matters: From Sex to Superconsciousness by Osho
Red Thunder & Red Lightning by John Varley
Pillow: Exploring the Heart of Eros by Lily Pond
The Tale of Tom Kitten by Beatrix Potter
Complete Sonnets by William Shakespeare
The True Game by Sher S. Tepper
The Wee Free Men by Terry Pratchett

What books are by your bedside table?

Talking to myself

“Blessed are we who can laugh at ourselves for we will never cease to be amused.” - anon

Some things I know about myself:
I am self reliant, self sufficient, and self supported.
I am self employed - I get to choose my OWN eighty hours a week.
I am self disciplined, extremely organized & efficient.
I have self worth, self respect, and self esteem.
I self pleasure, I am self satisfied, I am self contained.
I am self actualized, self fulfilled, and self regenerating.
I am frickin' lonely.

Years ago, in one of those true, new age hippy dippy santa cruz crunchy granola moments, I decided to marry myself. I loved my boyfriend dearly, but realized at some point we were never going to hear those wedding bells.

So I wrote some lovely vows to myself, bought myself a beautiful, expensive diamond & opal ring set in white gold, went to the ocean for a ritual with myself, and witnessed myself promising to love myself.

Well, time went on & I realized I was pretty bored with myself. Not wanting to cheat on aforementioned boyfriend, I decided to have an affair with myself. Every time he took a shower, I reached for the hitachi. Ditto when he mowed the lawn. It got to the point when my affair was taking over my life, and I caught myself sneaking off at parties to do myself in the bathroom.

Of course, once I stopped putting energy into my real relationship... well, that’s another story. So I found myself by myself, feeling all lonely and bitter, and wondering why I was single. Then it occurred to me - I wasn’t available! I was still always with myself!

So I divorced myself. Yep, went back down to the ocean, thanked myself for all the wonderful gifts from the relationship with myself, and chucked that expensive-ass diamond ring into the ocean. I still wonder who will it find it.

I love myself and I’m still best friends with myself, in fact, right now, I’m going to go play with myself. If you don’t think I’m a complete kook, come play with me sometime... I’m finally free!

After shock

Last night

you asked me
why I cried

Heaving naked sobs
against your chest

What can I say
except

After the earthquake
Tsunami

Sooner or Later

Sooner or later a person begins to notice that everything that happens to her is perfect, relates directly to who she is, had to happen, was meant to happen, plays its little role in fulfilling her destiny.

When she encounters difficulty, it no longer occurs to her to complain—she has learned to expect nothing, has learned that loss and frustration are a part of life, and come at their proper time—instead she asks herself, why is this happening?… by which she means, what can I learn from this, how will it strengthen me, make me more aware? She lets herself be strengthened, lets herself grow, just as she lets herself relax and enjoy (and grow) when life is gentle to her.

Strengthened by this simple notion, simple awareness, that life is perfect, that all things come at the proper moment and that she is always the perfect person for the situation she finds herself in, a person begins to feel more and more in tune with her inner nature, begins to find it easier and easier to do what she knows is right. All chance events appear to her to be intended; all intentional actions she clearly perceives as part of the workings of Chance.

Anxiety seldom troubles her; she knows her death will come at its proper moment; she knows her actions are right and therefore whatever comes to pass as a result of them will be what was meant to happen. When she does feel anxiety, she realizes it is because of that thing she’s been meaning to do but hasn’t been done, some unfulfilled relationship she’s been aware of, but… She perceives the anxiety as a message that she’ll have to stop hesitating if she wants to stay high…

(author unknown)

First Response

Wow.

I just got back from a trippy experience. I took my kid out to dinner at our favorite restaurant. Each with our book, we ordered our usual artichokes, spinach salad & chicken nuggles. Out of the blue, quite calmly and in a low voice, a woman said, "Call 911 - Please call 911".

I looked up & saw an elderly gentleman slumped in his chair. I walked up & said I knew CPR and reached for his throat pulse, finding none. I looked at the lady next to him, who was clearly terrified. "We need to get him onto the ground."

I put my arms around his shoulders and he slipped hard onto the floor, first his tailbone, then his back. Suddenly his eyes flew open & he started speaking in French. Since he was clearly breathing, I knew I didn't have to do mouth to mouth, just stay present. I looked in his eyes & rubbed in back, murmuring in French that he was going to be all right, everything was fine.

He started gagging and I called the waiter to bring a bowl, anything. The poor guy started barfing beyond belief, and I just continued to baby him. I looked up to see my kid across the room, watching with big round eyes.

The paramedics came in and took over. I went back to my table, pretty damn shaken. Thank goodness I took CPR this summer. Thank goodness I happen to speak a little french. "Are you okay?" I asked my kid.

Clinging to my arm for just a moment, all she said was, "You're my hero."

Wow.

Label Spices, Not People

My parents are not American, and we have never celebrated thanksgiving, so I was rather surprised when my mom called to see what I was up to today. I told her I was fixing my leaky toilet she volunteered to help, and bring lunch. Cool enough.

On arriving, she gave me an article on happiness from entitled “The Four Love Personalities: knowing your type is the key to a better relationship.” A friend's response was to move beyond labels. I pondered this on my morning walk.

What purpose do labels serve? Beyond distinguishing spices, I mean. What labels to you identify with? Dom, sub, top, bottom, gay, straight, bi, curious, poly - we use a lot of labels on line, striving to define ourselves in certain ways.

I have always considered myself bi, but do I really define myself by who I am fucking? Or my politics? I identify with being a switch, and definitely as queer, but have moved along the rainbow spectrum from lesbian seperatist to tresbian (tranny loving lesbian, and french for very good, get it, tres bien) to limerick queen of the universe.

For a long time I thought of myself as a single mom, so I was single, and a mom. Thoughts create reality. Now I'm putting myself out as available, fun, mature, experienced, and a roller skating babe. Life is good, and only getting better.

Other labels I resonate with feel like ingredients to the soup that is Lady of Delights: Witch, Priestess, Healer, Astrologer, Guide, Business Woman, Office Manager, Independent Contractor, Homemaker, Gardener, Teacher, Artist, Dancer, Friend, Confidant, Lover, and of course, most recently, Blogger...

You're so vain, I bet you think this blog is about you

You might think I'm watching But really I'm just raising An eyebrow...

Yes! Anything is Possible

I am walking on my path, I am aware of my stride
I don’t know where I am because I’m really journeying inside
I know my intention is to gather up information
The more I travel, the more I know - The journey is my destination

There is cool blue sky above me, and the good old earth below
I walk the path in the middle of dark forest and sweet meadow
Golden hills of California dipping down to gray sea
Heat and sun in contrast to the shade of the redwood tree

Walking along, singing my song, snake quickly crosses my path
Out of the light, just out of sight, Coyote has the last laugh
Coyote, my guardian, coyote my love -
We no longer walk this path together
But we will always be true friends -
And see each other through any weather

I believe we create our destiny, I believe we create our own fate
Go back to the forest, Coyote - And find your coyote mate
For I am a bird woman - I take to the sky
In these moments of transendance, I know I was born to fly

It seems it’s been so long now, I have walked my path alone
But I have been feathering my nest - I have been building a home
Now I am in a hang glider, suspended in the air
I have a new perspective on my worries & my cares

Purple with rainbow edges, strapped in, safe as can be
The higher I spiral upwards, the more I leave my story behind me
I see pennants in the breeze - A festive village beckons below me
Flags & ribbons, music & laughter, a place filled with magic & beauty

I land in the center, I am in the middle of it all
At last I’ve found my circle - The place where I can stand tall
I am a leader without followers. I have been exiled in the past
I’m here to share, I’m here to learn - I’m here for as long as it lasts

I need to adapt, I need to adopt, I need my tribe, I need my community
I need my kin, to be one with my kind - And one of a kind, unique & free
I am here to serve, and here to give
I am here to receive - I am here to live

I am here for information - I go to see the shaman
She is wise, she is wonderful, the gypsy in her caravan
Laden with herbs, hanging from the ceiling,
satin cushions covered the floor
She reads the stars, she reeds the cards -
And then she shares even more

She anoints me with oil, every chakra, head to toe
Sweet lavender, clary sage, parsley, and a drop of mistletoe
I am grateful to be here - I am grateful to reach her
I have found my next home, I have found my next teacher

I set off on a journey, I knew anything was possible
I said yes to my self because I know I am capable
I am walking on my path - I am aware of my stride
I know exactly where I am - Because I journey inside.

02/11/06

My Key

What is a visionary consultant? In the simplest of terms, my job is to guide your body and mind to be in alignment, to experience balance in your heart and spirit. I am a faith healer, here to remind you that you hold the key to the gateway within. I am certified in both hypnotherapy and reiki, which I combine with tarot and astrology for holistic consultations. I have had my private practice for 19 years now.

My clients range from cancer patients to folks with phobias, people in deep grief or trapped in anxiety. For a complete mindbody experience, I combine my services with a chiropractor, an acupuncturist, a massage therapist and a nutritionist. Together we provide alternatives to surgery & prescription drugs, to live more vibrantly on all levels, physical & emotional.

I am a priestess, and spend most of my day in prayer, meditation, ritual or energy work. Luckily I am also a hedonistic pagan, and believe in exploring all aspects of sacred sexuality, so even masturbating is one of the ways I connect with the divine every day, besides for blogging. I am blessed to live in a community that supports my livelihood and encourages alternative practices,and to work with other highly trained professionals in my field.

Anyway, this is my newest tat, a few months old, still kinda itchy and raised - smack in the middle of my spine, the artist had an incredibly light touch and was done in under an hour. Part of the tat looks like the symbol for Chiron, the Wounded Healer (go ahead, Google it, I know you want to). Chiron's message is: how do you change your deepest wound into your greatest gift?

Logo by Cherie Lovedog, Lovedog Tattoo Studio, Santa Cruz 2007.

Armband 1

This is my astrological mandala. My sun sign is Libra (keywords, I create beauty), I have Leo rising (pay attention to ME! I mean, um, I show...) & my moon is in Aquarius (I'm different - no shit).

When my daughter was around 3, we were sitting on the back deck talking about astrology. I told her that, as a Libra, I see my soul's purpose is to create beauty.

With big round eyes, she solemnly looked up at me and declared,. "Mom, my soul's purpose - is to watch videos."

Out of the mouths of babes...

Celtic arm band by Cherie Lovedog, Santa Cruz CA, 1997

Black Fairy

I found this image in a book of fonts -
it was my logo for "Fairy Thoughtful" gifts...
I love her little pot belly, just like mine. She's inked on my right shoulder, like a little guardian angel, whispering in my ear...

Priestess

Today’s early morning ritual
I am raven

burner
of lavender

reader
of the cards

diviner
of the stars

eater
of cold pizza

Retail Therapy

Lookee at what I just bought at Goodwill for $3.25 - A GORGEOUS deep burgundy corset, trimmed in black lace with a sheer top with sparkly black roses scattered all over it. It fits me perfectly! Snort! Retail therapy at it's best, I tell ya...

My best friend Jen, who has been my neighbor for fifteen years now, came over to take tattoo pictures. I love her - she is simply unfazed. "Just be safe, K" she smiles. She is a great Scorpio and knows all my secrets. Yep, even that one about you.

New Moon in Scorpio

Too Blessed
To be Stressed
and
Too Anointed
To be Disappointed

Epitaph

What would you like your epitaph be?

It was a typical night with typical friends drinking a typical amount of wine. Halloween around the corner, and we were swapping stories of friends who had died recently. More specifically, how they had died, and what we considered a "good death" to be.

Of course, one person has to say, "I hope I die while having sex!" Which we all agreed would suck for the partner of the deceased.

You won't be surprised to hear that I decided that I want to die while masturbating.

That way my epitaph can be,

She had a hand in it.

Messages from Seaglass

Once I met a wind swept man
Who constructed his days
and spent his nights in craft,
And the time betweens
Sifting the beaches
For bits of precious sea glass.

Milky white, palest aqua,
Sea green, and cobalt blues,
Burnished browns, occasional reds
And the rarest of violet hues.

These shards of the past
Once raw and jagged
Now polished and refined
He would into make jewelry
Creating a holder,
A reminder of the divine.

Solidly set in silver
Skillfully soldered
Edges worked intaglio-
Stars and moons,
Cut outs to reveal
The treasured inner glow.

How like our hearts...

What was once a whole vessel
To whatever elixir
Ambrosia in the moment
Containing the promise of eternity
Infinity in a bottle
Or so we took for granted.

Suddenly smashed and broken
Tumbled by turmoil
Tossed by tides of grief.
Scoured by remorse
Cleansed of regret
These fragments of relief.

Shrapnel of the soul
Now soft, eroded edges
Worn smooth by patience.
Translucent, transcendent,
A constant reminder:
Time is precious.

Sea glass, see glass
See through the looking glass...
Salt tears and wisdom know-
Sand once melted
Sand now scoured
Even glass will flow.

Milky white, palest aqua
Sea green baubles
Hung on sterling chains
Reminding the throat
Reminding the heart
Cherish each moment that remains.

Folder of Desire

I found this image on a rubber stamp and fell in love with it right away. In my file cabinet, I have "The Folder of Desire" and whenever an image speaks to me, it gets popped in here. It might be years before I actually get it inked, but I really believe in THINKING about what one is about to permanently inscribe on one's body...

Money Meditation

I am a skilled practitioner of the healing arts and an excellent businesswoman. I have many, deeply satisfied repeat clients, who pay me highly, and who spread the kind word to their friends and family who would also benefit from my services. I know that work is love made visible, and I enjoy my chosen path in creating right livelihood for myself and my loved ones.

I am wise with my money. I dedicate part to pay off my debts easily and effortlessly; part for my savings, which I then invest and watch grow; and the remainder I live on in comfort and moderation. I am now in a position to bless money as it goes out to pay my bills and pleasures, knowing it will return threefold.

I live each day feeling wealthy, open-hearted and free. I trust that I will have what I need because I trust the financial wisdom within myself. I trust that money comes into my life to provide what I need. I am responsible with my money, and I am generous with my money. I contribute to all that I want to see flourish in myself, my family, my community, & my charities.

I am now truly at peace with money.
Blessed Be.

Black Mermaid

I've always considered myself a girly-girl, despite dressing as a tomboy when growing up. I had my hair down to my waist, and at one point could actually sit on it.

When I opened my bookstore, I deliberately cut all my hair off to look more dykey, to be a warrior in the streets & lover in the sheets. I had a butch little flat top for years, which was usually dyed some array of colors.

This mermaid is my long hair, cascading down my back, reminding me of my more gentle, feminine form. I actually found the flash in a tattoo magazine, and have seen another women with the same tattoo, only on both of her forearms in mirror images. Very cool.

I closed my store four years ago, and have been growing out my hair, wearing long skirts & dresses, feeling more like the priestess that I am than the need to call forth the warrior within.

Mermaid by Cherie Lovedog, Santa Cruz CA, 1995

Litany of Lovers

Mercury Retrograde
And to calm my chattering mind
I recite a litany of lovers
A rosary of remembrance
Prayers for the lovers gone by

Mercury retrospect
And to calm my chattering heart
I recite a litany of lovers
Beading hopes & beliefs
Prayers for the lovers yet to be

Mercury reviewed
And to calm my chattering soul
I find the repeated pattern
In my litany of lovers
My rosary of remembrance
The common thread throughout
Is the lover in me

Babylon

This was my second tattoo. Sweet kitty Babylon. Babs for short. Killed at two years old. On my back, she is behind me, but always a part of me. I know someone with the same tattoo. That's another story.

Aphrodite

I walk my own path
Alone and strong
And I have Aphrodite
Covering my back

I will not reveal to you
Love still raw and scabbed
I will wait
Until my healing is
Complete

12 hours over five months. Each session more intense than the last, as I would not fully heal between sessions. Layers upon layers, she worked in the colors as I worked out the pain, raw flesh, raw throat, raw to the bone.

Aphrodite (Mucha) on left shoulder by Robin Lovedog, Lovedog Tattoo, Santa Cruz CA 2001

Morning Glory Fairy

Morning glory fairy goes all the way from my ankle to my knee, peaking out the slit in my skirt as I walk up the stairs.

Originally all inked in pale blue, recolored twice, a continuing work in progress. My daughter said she needed friends, so I added the dragonflies & bee later.

Fairy by Robin Lovedog, Santa Cruz CA 1999

Untitled

This morning I awake
To your sleeping face
Next to mine
So strong, so soft
So divine

You opened your eyes
As I caressed you
You really are
My perfect lover
My soul mate

And I thought
As you stretched, and purred
Now if only we were
The same species...

July 2004

Labrys

In the tarot, blades represent the mental realm, and we are familiar with the concept of the double edged sword. The labrys is the double headed battle ax used by the Amazons, not just in war, but to plow the fields. This represents are ability to destroy and to create, specifically using both our right brain & our left brain, to destroy old outdated thought patterns and to create new fresh fields for seed thoughts to grow & flourish.

The two blades also represent the waxing & waning of the moon, the twining rose a blossoming caduceus.

Labrys tattoo by Tatiana of Terra Nova Tattoo, 1990

California poppies

My soul sister, Madame Scorpifly, designed the most beautiful two tattoos that travel up her calves - this is a merging of her designs, going down my back. Easily one of my personal favorites, I love the bud, bloom and decay...

Sun & Moon

When I was a senior in high school, I went to Key West for winter break. We saw the play Talking With: Confessions of Eleven Extraordinary Women written by Jane Martin.

One monologue was about a middle aged woman who led a desperately boring life, until one night after her divorce, she was accosted in a parking lot and her face sliced with a knife. Rather than getting plastic surgery, she realized for the first time people noticed her. The lights come up on stage & you see she is completely tattooed, she then describes the meaning of each one, and how her life was transformed from that moment.

This story struck me deep, and I got my first ink a week later, this sun above my hip bone, which has blurred and faded over time, despite being recolored twice. It was not until recently that I added the moon, who is so crisp in contrast. The moon image is from a label from a cigar box - "Double Happiness Brand Cigars".

I had the honor of performing Talking With on stage for three weeks when I was 23 and living in Northern Idaho (on the Canadian border, no less). The make up artist would paint my body each night, intertwining my tattoos with the ones from the play. So much fun, to become the character I admired.

And boy, do I get noticed. It's pretty rare that I show my tatts in public any more, I just don't really want that much attention (except here on my blog, don't get me wrong.) When I do show my colors, I love feeling a part of the freak show, and seeing who is brave enough to walk up and say just hi. It cracks me up how intimidated people are by my tattoos, when I am the sweetest, nicest, SHYEST person at heart. My body is an illuminated manuscript, and I love to share my stories.

When I see other folks with tattoos, I always take a moment to flash a smile, raise my eyebrows, and simply say, "Nice ink."

Sun by Julie Moon of Dragonmoon Tattoo Studio, Glen Burnie, MD, 1984
Moon by Robin Lovedog, Lovedog Tattoo Studio, Santa Cruz CA, 2003

Catcher Signalling Left Field

Talking out in the parking lot
After the softball game
I wanted to ask you
Everything

There is a light
In your deep brown eyes
That keeps me thinking
Wondering
What sparks your fire

I know nothing about you
Except I like your car
And how every time I see you
My hips rotate
In your direction

Will you step up to bat?
Will you have follow through?
Or is it three strikes
And you’re out

And when you’re there in the field
I wonder
What else could you catch
And far could you throw

Meet me at home plate
There’s a lot I’d like to know...

Passion Vine

Today

Robin fills in
Fiery phoenix hummingbird
And today
The pain is over
I’m just a littler bit sore...
Here comes the itchy part
The irritating part
Before my skin reveals
Fresh healing...



Passion vine around left breast by Robin Lovedog, Santa Cruz, 2004

Double Hummingbirds

Hummingbirds represent
unfettered joy,
embracing what makes you happy,
counting your blessing,
and opening to pleasure...

 

Double Happiness

Couple of folks have asked the stories behind my tattoos, so inspired by Trinity I decided to post bloggettes on each, then you can vote on your favorites. I started getting inked at 18, average one a year, and now have 27 totaling about 60 hours of work from nine different artists.

Not my first, but if I only had one tattoo - it would be this one, Double Happiness. Tattooed in red above my heart, it is a symbol of hope and wholeness.

I do not believe in Plato’s concept that our soul’s are split apart at birth, and we search the earth for other other half - usually we think the better half.

I am a whole person. You are a whole person. Together, we are double happiness - sharing our resources and creating something we could not create alone.

When I look down my chest, it looks like the double venus sign, but more than that, like two dancing figures wearing funny hats. Double the pleasure, double the fun - I know, I sound like a gum commercial...

In the ancient Tang Dynasty, there was a student who was on the way to the capital to attend the national final examination, in which the top learners would be selected as the ministers in the court. Unfortunately, he fell ill halfway when he passed through a mountain village. Thanks to a herbalist doctor and his daughter, he was taken to their house and treated well. He recovered quickly due to the father and the daughter's good care. Well, when he had to leave, he found it hard to say good-bye to the pretty girl, and so did she. They fell in love. So the girl wrote down the right hand part of an antithetical couplet for the student to match:

"Green trees against the sky in the spring rain while the sky set off the spring trees in the obscuration."

"Well, I can make it though it is not easy. But you'll have to wait till I have finished the examination." replied the student. The young girl nodded in significance.

In the examination the young man won the first place, who was appreciated by the emperor. Also the winners were interviewed and tested by the emperor. As luck would have it, he was asked by the emperor to finish a couplet, which would need a right part as the answer. The emperor wrote:

"Red flowers dot the land in the breeze's chase while the land colored up in red after the kiss."

The young man realized immediately the right part of the couplet by the girl was the perfect fit to the emperor's couplet, so he took the girl's part as the answer without hesitation. The emperor was delighted to see the matching half of his couplet was so talent and harmonious that he authorized the young man's identity as Minister in the court and allowed him to pay a visit to his hometown first before holding the post. The young man met the girl happily at home and told her the emperor's couplet. They soon got married. For the wedding, the couple DOUBLED the Chinese character, HAPPY, together, on a red piece of paper and put it on the wall to express the happiness for the two events. And from then on, it has been taken on and became a social custom.

Double Happiness Tattoo by Robin Lovedog, 2003

First date

I was so excited for my first online date. I fluttered around the house being as femmy as possible, trying on outfits, deciding on make up, acting like a teenage girl.

As I gave myself a little trim, I thought to myself, I've heard of manicures and pedicures, but would this be considered a pussicure?

Temple of Laphrodite

Welcome to the Enchanted World of the Lady of Delights-

Laughter is the best medicine, but as far as I'm concerned, it's also the best lube. I used to be a priestess of Aphrodite, but she was such a bitch - all those lessons in love, including jealousy & heartache, misery & despair.

Now I am Priestess of Laphrodite, Goddess of the Belly laugh. She feeds my soul & nurtures my spirit, reminding me of the sacred creed,
"All Acts of Love and Pleasure Are My Ritual..."
Take a moment to go inside, where myth and reality are one...

All pictures are taken by me, of my garden or myself, anything else has credit given.